Cowell is, in polite terms, a kind of cultural critic. In less polite terms, he is someone who needs to get his rocks off by giving young idiots a severe (and usually verbose) dressing down. Who could forget his legendary take-down of Kristy-Lee Cook in season seven, telling her she sounded like Dolly Parton on helium. The thing that catapults Cowell from cultural critic to diva is not only did he have strong opinions on amateurs far below his pay grade, but he crafted one of the most popular shows in television history around his ability to tell people how much better he is than them. It doesn’t take much to insult Cowell’s delicate artistic sensibilities, and so one must wonder how he ever thought that being a critic of any kind would be an ideal profession for one so already disappointed with the constant mediocrity of the world?
